- January 5, 2015 at 5:42 am #8428
Post subject: Anger ManagementPostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 8:28 am
Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2004 7:25 pm
Ok, this is one of my favorite topics. Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats; it inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival.
The instinctive, natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively. Unexpressed anger can create other problems. It can lead to pathological expressions of anger, such as passive-aggressive behavior (getting back at people indirectly, without telling them why, rather than confronting them head-on) or a personality that seems perpetually cynical and hostile.
Sometimes, our anger and frustration are caused by very real and inescapable problems in our lives. Not all anger is misplaced, and often it’s a healthy, natural response to these difficulties. There is also a cultural belief that every problem has a solution, and it adds to our frustration to find out that this isn’t always the case. The best attitude to bring to such a situation, then, is not to focus on finding the solution, but rather on how you handle and face the problem.
Is It Good To “Let it All Hang Out?”
Psychologists now say that this is a dangerous myth. Some people use this theory as a license to hurt others. Research has found that “letting it rip” with anger actually escalates anger and aggression and does nothing to help you (or the person you’re angry with) resolve the situation.
It’s best to find out what it is that triggers your anger, and then to develop strategies to keep those triggers from tipping you over the edge. Anger is a completely normal human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems.
Are You Too Angry?
There are psychological tests that measure the intensity of angry feelings, how prone to anger you are, and how well you handle it. But chances are good that if you do have a problem with anger, you already know it. If you find yourself acting in ways that seem out of control and frightening, you might need help finding better ways to deal with this emotion.
You can’t get rid of, or avoid, the things or the people that enrage you, nor can you change them, but you can learn to control your reactions.
Some simple steps you can try:
Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won’t relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your “gut.”
Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as “relax,” “take it easy.” Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.
Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.
Nonstrenuous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.
Practice these techniques daily. Learn to use them automatically when you’re in a tense situation.
Last edited by Alex on Wed Sep 22, 2004 11:33 am, edited 1 time in total.
Post subject: PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 9:03 am
Joined: Tue Aug 17, 2004 12:56 pm
I guess it all depends on the person, but I used to try these and I must admit that they really work. It doesn’t take much time to learn how to control ur own nerves.
p.s. certain amount of anger is nessessery to our survival ON THE MAT (RING) 😉
Post subject: PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2004 12:27 pm
Joined: Tue Jul 06, 2004 9:54 am
Location: colorado springs
Counting to ten sounds cheesy..but does work. I find that when my hubby pisses me off..and he does it alot…my heavy bag gets a good beating. I get all the anger and stress out with out hurting anyone and I am calmer and more able to talk to him about what he did to piss me off. I am trying to teach him how to deal with his stress and anger as well, since he has post traumatic stress disorder from being in Iraq. Thursday nights are also my night to get rid of stress. That is spar night at my dojo..we also have Friday Night Fight Night where the karate students fight with the Krav Maga students. I havent been to that one yet, but will start going this week. Sensei has only just started doing that.
The key is to let out the anger without hurting someone else. If you cant tell them why you are mad with out being an ass about it..walk away…chill out then when you are calm, talk to the person who pissed you off. If they know what pissed you off, then chances are as long as they are not just a total d***head, they wont do it again.
Post subject: PostPosted: Sat Sep 11, 2004 9:15 am
Joined: Sat Sep 11, 2004 9:06 am
when you godda beat people up. better to do it legal like So you don’t go to gail.
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