Not My Daughter

This topic contains 0 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Chad Moechnig 1 year, 8 months ago.

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    Chad Moechnig
    Keymaster

    Eithne
    Post subject: Not My Daughter PostPosted: Fri Apr 22, 2005 9:22 am

    Joined: Wed Feb 09, 2005 12:35 pm
    Posts: 8
    Location: UK
    “My mother was never particularly encouraging, but when I took up martial arts, she went ballistic.”

    “After picking me up from jujitsu, my mum went mad and I wasn’t allowed to go back. It happened when she saw me grappling on the mat with my instructor. She says he’s perverted and I just don’t know it.”

    “I couldn’t take the grading as my mum refused to buy the sparring gear. She said there was no way she was having me going around hitting people.”

    “Mine refused to have the words ‘martial arts’ spoken in the house. I was never allowed to even mention it.”

    “Mum finally snapped and accused the whole class as being a ring of mad
    perverts who lured female students into their evil clutches. “You’re no good at it,” she yelled, “They’re all laughing at you. They just tell you that to keep you there. They all just want to f*** you.”

    —-

    Upon asking around girls in various countries studying various arts, I found that this phenomenon is by no means isolated. Mums don’t just dislike their daughter’s participation in the MA – many seem to take an extreme stance against it.

    I’m currently in the process of writing an article/report on this ‘phenomenon’ :p and would therefore like anyone at all to answer the following if you’d be so kind. This is the only forum where I’ll get lots of opinions of those who really FIGHT fight, rather than practise/train, etc….

    1. Assuming you took up MA as a young person under parents or guardians, were they supportive of your choice? Were they encouraging, nonchalent, didn’t really bother, didn’t notice, quite negative, thought it was silly, very negative, downright abusive?

    2. Do you have another hobby? Was their reaction to your doing THAT hobby similar or dissimilar to their reaction of you doing an MA?

    3. Have you ever been accused of doing MA just to get closer to guys?

    4. Have you ever recieved any other bizarre or undue accusations regarding your reasons to do MA (ie, smile, ‘for the image’, etc…)

    5. Is ‘image’ important to you? Do you enjoy telling others what you do? Do you sometimes demonstrate joint locks etc to others?

    Any other thoughts or opinions on the matter would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

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    miss kharitonov
    Post subject: PostPosted: Fri Apr 22, 2005 10:34 am

    Joined: Tue Mar 29, 2005 2:39 am
    Posts: 53
    Location: france
    taht’s all my life written in this article!! fortunately now i’m older and can do whatever i want without being judge and i practice thaïboxing which is not a tender sport for girls.
    so i’ll be very happy to help you in a way with your articles, don’t hesitate to ask more if you feel like it :

    1. Assuming you took up MA as a young person under parents or guardians, were they supportive of your choice? Were they encouraging, nonchalent, didn’t really bother, didn’t notice, quite negative, thought it was silly, very negative, downright abusive?

    *they said i wouldn’t be able to do that because i were too skinny and people there wouold laughed at me and try to “kill” me in a way. i would be always at the hospital complaining about broken nose or legs etc… they totally forbid me to do such a “crazy” thing to practice martial arts.

    2. Do you have another hobby? Was their reaction to your doing THAT hobby similar or dissimilar to their reaction of you doing an MA?

    * i play electric guitar and play with my rat too. i’m also a lot into computers. of course, they agree this hobbies

    3. Have you ever been accused of doing MA just to get closer to guys?
    *no

    4. Have you ever recieved any other bizarre or undue accusations regarding your reasons to do MA (ie, smile, ‘for the image’, etc…)
    * to be more aggressive and to beat other people swithout reason. i was seen as an insane girl who wanted to learn from boys to get more powerfull to beat others at school. (which is totally wrong, i had been beaten by others at school and never respond anything).

    5. Is ‘image’ important to you? Do you enjoy telling others what you do? Do you sometimes demonstrate joint locks etc to others?
    * now i’m proud i reached my goal and can practice freely thaïboxing with so cool guys in the club. i am very glad and happy to go there each time and to feel in a better shape. i demonstrate what i learnt at the club to my parents and ironicaly, they are very proud of me, still afraid but very proud. so what the hell they reacted like that in those times, i wasted time.

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    Rox21
    Post subject: PostPosted: Sat Apr 23, 2005 1:14 am
    Pro Fighter

    Joined: Mon Apr 05, 2004 6:49 pm
    Posts: 1334
    Location: Kanagawa/Japan
    That sucks a lot. I’m so glad that my mom is open minded enough to see how much it means to be, watch class, and see what nice people everyone at my club are. She always drove me around to Tae Kwon Do and Judo events. I got into it as my parents were getting divorced, but he thought it was cool at first. (Then again, I was only doing no contact TKD..if it was grappling, I dunno)

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    coslisa
    Post subject: PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2005 6:45 am
    Pro Fighter

    Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 6:39 am
    Posts: 131
    Location: North East England
    My Mam doesn’t want to know about it, she said she would never come and see me fight because if the opponent hit me once she would be jumping over the cage (she’s only 4ft 8 tall) or ring and hitting them back for me. She won’t even watch a video of my fights or even want to know when I’m fighting, i have to ring her up and say by the way I had a fight last night and this was the result and I’m okay.

    I started a self-defense martial art class when I was 22 (Aikido) and started doing MMA when I was 23, so she knows that it’s my choice but she would just rather not know about it.

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    Rikki
    Post subject: PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2005 8:54 am
    Instructor

    Joined: Mon Aug 09, 2004 6:56 am
    Posts: 915
    Location: Lexington, KY
    Quote:
    she said she would never come and see me fight because if the opponent hit me once she would be jumping over the cage (she’s only 4ft 8 tall) or ring and hitting them back for me.

    My Mom said the same thing regarding my fight. I didn’t start MMA until I was 19 though and had never done any other martial art so she couldn’t say much. She just doesn’t want me to get hurt. My Dad wanted to come to my fight but Mom said, “No way.”

    When I was younger (6 – 10) she wouldn’t let me join a martial arts class because it was “full of boys” and they “wouldn’t be nice to me”. That was also her reason for not letting me play Little League baseball, though.

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    TrickyNishidake
    Post subject: PostPosted: Fri May 13, 2005 4:50 pm

    Joined: Fri May 13, 2005 4:30 pm
    Posts: 3
    Location: Washington
    coslisa wrote:
    she said she would never come and see me fight because if the opponent hit me once she would be jumping over the cage (she’s only 4ft 8 tall) or ring and hitting them back for me.

    lol, that sounds exactly like my mom too. it’s amazing how much taller she seems when she thinks somone might have hurt me…scary!

    My parents are really supportive of me doing MA. I’m 24 and I do MT and BJJ. My dad took TKD and Judo when he was younger and they always wanted to get me into karate or something cause they thought it would be really good for my self-esteem. Un fortunately, they could never afford it, but they supported me in every sport I played in school, even when I turned out for the boy’s baseball team.

    My mom enjoys hearing about what I did in class that day and what not, but if I go to visit with bruises she gets all upset and has to doctor me. she’s just naturally protective about me, but I can see in her eyes at the same time that she’s so very proud of what I’ve accomplished. I don’t think I would want my mom to see me fight though, because I know she would be white-knuckled the whole time, and would probably end up getting escorted from the event by security for trying to storm the ring and save her baby, lol

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